Apparently Not

Ali is busy playing with her imaginary friends. They are looking over the atlas, talking about where everyone lives. She "looked" at them, then looked at me and said "Oh, that's my mom, she doesn't know anything."

Great.

Proof

Ready to cook Costco lasagna, baseball caps and 800 milligram Motrin - mommy's little helpers and all proof of God's love.

Last night, while Ali and Isabella were having a bath, Ali asked a question that led to Isabella asking a question, which led to me giving the girls a short lesson in the female anatomy. I know grown women who don't understand how all of their parts work, and so I figured I might as well start teaching some of this stuff to the girls now. Knowledge is power - right?

"So, this part of your body does this, this one does that and that part is where the baby comes out." (I used the correct terms, but I will spare you those.)

Thoughtful Silence.

"You mean the baby (and here she creates a round circle with her hands) comes out of that tiny hole!!!!?"

"Yep, Isabella it sure does."

"Well, too bad. I'm not having a baby!"

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

"And, I am definitely NOT having a girl because she will probably want to paint her nails and do her makeup and all that gross stuff."

"But, Isabella, I'm gonna have a girl because boys are so gross and stuff. I don't like boys. They are so stinky" offers little Ali.


"Well, whatever. All I know is I'm not havin' nooooo baby!"

Lesson Learned

I learned something important today.

NEVER ask your tall, glamazon friend, who has legs twice as long as yours, what her running route is and then run it.

You will come home, shower, eat way too much because you are exhausted, pick your daughter up from preschool and then pass out on the couch while she consumes unhealthy quantities of Sun Chips and watches TV.

I have the legs of a chubby eight year old, she has the legs of a supermodel - I don't know what I was thinking.

Wanna Bet?

Yesterday morning, Jimmy and I went for a run. The weather was good, about 29 degrees when we left with no wind. The run wasn't great - I am learning that sometimes they aren't- but it gave us a chance to catch up on our hectic week and it is always good to get outside and see the mountains. Last night I asked Jimmy if he wanted to run with me again in the morning.

"No, it is going to be too cold."

"So what? I am going to run anyway."

"It is supposed to snow."

"I'll still go. What will you give me if I do?"

"What do you want?"

NEVER ask your wife that question. The answer came to me instantly -

"A day off of dishes."

"Done."

This morning when I got up the temperature was 12 degrees with a windchill of 5. I am not sure how, but over the course of the evening the reward was upped to two days off of dish duty. So, I ate breakfast, the sun came out and I checked the temperature again. It was up to 14 degrees, the windchill 6, gusts up to 20mph. Two days off of dishes - totally worth it!

"Hey Jimmy, it's one mile for one day right?"

"No, three miles total."

Beast!

It was cold, it was windy but I did it! 3.2 miles in 45 minutes.

Take that!

I looked very goofy - pockets stuffed with tissue and four layers will do that to you. By the time I got done my hat was crooked, but I did it!





PS - When I took off my jacket it was wet on the inside lining. My brother in law, who is very wise in these matters - is here visiting and so today he helped me pick out a new BREATHABLE jacket that will keep me warmer and less wet. Very exciting! I'll have to post a picture of that when it arrives...

PPS - My brother in law let me wear his Garmin watch while I ran. I have made fun of Garmins and people who wear them, I'll admit it. Do you really need to know how fast you are running -you're running aren't you? Isn't that good enough? Heart rate - who cares - I can feel it bursting from my chest! But, I now want one, badly. So badly that when I was at a coffee shop today, I didn't order a truffle to go with my drink because I thought "Oh, I could put that 2 bucks toward my Garmin." I told my sister in law this and she said

"Welcome to the world of obsessive exercisers."

I think she has been trying to pull me to the dark side for a long time. Now that I think about it she and her husband probably planned the whole "Hey, want to wear my watch while you run?"

So, my plan is to sell anything I can on Craigslist to make enough money to pay for a Garmin of my own!

Word of the Day

Your word of the day is

Atelectasis

What is atelectasis?

A person with atelectasis has a collapse of the tiny air pockets in the lung, called alveoli. This interrupts breathing in the area where the atelectasis has occurred. Atelectasis is a condition that can accompany lung disease, such as pneumonia, COPD, and asthma. It may also develop after surgery in patients who undergo general anesthesia. What are the symptoms of atelectasis?Common symptoms of atelectasis include fever and cough. More severe symptoms include rapid breathing, difficulty breathing, wheezing, and coughing up blood.

I learned this word yesterday from Ali's doctor. Yep, she's got a small area of atelectasis along with walking pneumonia. Lovely!

Excrement

I have slipped on the ice twice in the last two days. I suppose skidded would be a more correct description of what I did, because I managed to keep my balance and not fall. The cost of not breaking a bone was wrenching my back, but I am okay with that. What I am not okay with is the fact that this has happened, especially twice in two days! In the 7, almost 8 years I have lived in cold, snowy and icy areas I have never, not once slipped or skidded on ice. Seriously. Am I getting old? Perhaps Colorado Springs is icier than other places I lived. Once it got cold in Boston, it stayed that way. Here it gets cold, then warm, which allows for melting and then FREEZING cold again, creating ice patches that are hard to distinguish from wet patches. Whatever the problem is, it is all interfering with my ability to run, and my sense of coolness.

Wait! What was that? You read correctly, I am running! But that post will have to wait. Tonight I slipped coming out of Panera with hot soup and it is waiting for me...

But here are three random thoughts that are rolling around in my head. The skid dislodged them, I think.

~They don't sell Mod Podge at CVS.

~I don't like dishsoap that is scented. Once I bought some fruity dish soap and had to give it away because I couldn't stand the smell. I want my dishes to have no scent or have the scent of the food on them only. Last night I paid $4.00 for Seventh Generation dishsoap because the cheap ones all had a scent to them.

~ In my entire life I only heard my dad cuss once when he was trying to fix a toaster. And then he apologized. He did say feces, but that doesn't count as a bad word. I cuss, you all know it, but I am trying to do it less. Though some of you bring it out in me! TB, JD, HW - you know who you are! But, I do try to cuss using the first letter of the word, which is clever, I think. And, I started doing that long before texting, so I didn't steal it from that!

So, I am going to go eat my soup and take some Motrin for my GD back!

Adversity doesn't build character, it reveals it.

Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.

~James Arthur Baldwin

But, do as I say, NOT as I do is so much easier to do!